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How to deal with a controlling partner

by Johana Mukandila
Picture: Pexels

A controlling spouse may make relationships extremely difficult. Controlling partners frequently micromanage, reprimand, and restrict the other partner’s actions.

You might be able to work with your partner to strengthen your relationship, or you might gain from counseling, depending on how severe and regular these controlling behaviors are, you may need to think about ending the relationship with your controlling partner if the behavior is particularly severe or does not get better with treatment in order to recover from it.

According to Psych Central here are signs of a controlling partner:

  • They make decisions for you.
  • They’re overprotective.
  • They play the blame game.
  • They criticize you.
  • They micromanage you.
  • They isolate you from others.
  • They gaslight you.
  • They invade your privacy.

How to deal with a controlling partner:

Set Boundaries 

In a relationship, you naturally deserve respect, so it’s critical that you speak out for your needs and rights. According to Choosing Therapy, setting boundaries allows you to express your expectations and decide what actions you’ll take if your spouse goes beyond them. Boundaries might range from requesting that he go to his own therapy to ordering you to leave the room if he criticises you.

Talk to your spouse 

Your partner might be under stress or responding to a dynamic in your marriage if the conduct is very new (and moderate). It might be a good idea to speak with him right now. Be clear in outlining how his actions are directly affecting you in your statement of sentiments.

Reach out for help

Try to reach out to others during this period, despite your feelings of embarrassment. Having support is important whether or not you want to stay in the relationship. You can receive support, safety, and direction from your loved ones. They might be able to add their two cents by talking about your spouse.

Get therapy 

If your partner takes the initiative to improve, couples counseling can be helpful. Remember that if your relationship is physically violent, you shouldn’t do it. According to Choosing Therapy discrimination counseling might help you both make up your minds about whether you want to stay married if you are both feeling conflicted about it.

The publication further advises that one should take into account the advantages of getting your own therapy. You require a secure environment to examine your emotions. Use an internet therapist directory as a starting point for your quest.

Leave

Controlling behaviors frequently reveal an emotional abuse cycle. You might need to reconsider your marriage if your partner is unwilling to see trends or take the initiative to improve states the publication  mentioned above. 

Also see: Signs you are growing apart from your partner

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